The traditional trans story describes a person who must transition from one binary gender to the other to escape extreme gender dysphoria. This may be true for some. But there are many ways to think about and carry out a transition, and they don’t always have to include self-loathing.
So someone you care about has just come out to you as trans. You have been trusted with a great honor and responsibility. As a trans ally you can be the support that helps your loved one navigate their own path to living authentically.
Maybe you want to help, but don’t know how. Here are a few suggestions.
Congratulations on coming out as trans! I know that’s gonna sound sarcastic, but I swear it isn’t. Even if you’ve only come out to yourself, you’ve done a brave thing, and I’m proud of you.
Being trans is especially hard at first. The way I got through was finding resources, role models, and community. There will be many more resource lists to come, but here are the basics I think every trans person should know about.
When I’m sad, I watch videos and tv. Unfortunately, trans people aren’t always treated very well in popular media. We’re often depicted as the freaks, the punchline, and the ultimate strike-out when a guy tries to pick up a girl. We have enough shitty things happen to us in real life; we don’t need more of it. That’s why we need more media that makes us feel included, worthy, and empowered.
One of my favorite examples is Her Story, a YouTube mini-series. This show “looks inside the dating lives of trans & queer women as they navigate the intersections of desire & identity.” You can watch all six parts for free at herstoryshow.com or on YouTube.