A guide for transgender and gender expansive people and their allies

Category: Education

What’s the word?

There are many terms related to queer, trans, and gender-expansive people. I’ve been out as pansexual for almost a decade and genderfluid trans feminine for several years, and I don’t know them all. Thankfully, there are excellent glossaries online. GLAAD has also provided suggestions for what words to avoid and what alternatives work better.

However, it can be helpful to focus less on specifics. Let’s zoom out to achieving the goal of using sensitive language. That is, facilitating discussions in a fair and accurate way that welcomes everyone safely into the wider conversation.

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Some words on words

This is not a comprehensive guide to the “right” language to use when discussing trans topics, and these topics are subject to change just like any aspect of language. But to start off, let’s start with a metaphor. Let’s say you’re explaining the three states of matter that water can take: ice, water, and water vapor.

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Am I Trans?

The short answer: I can’t tell you. In a masterstroke of unhelpfulness, I have to tell you the truth: only you can decide if you’re trans. Even then, there isn’t a definitive test to find out. So instead of telling you if you’re trans, I’m going to give you a few questions to meditate on and some experiments to try out.

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Transition: Blooming into You

The traditional trans story describes a person who must transition from one binary gender to the other to escape extreme gender dysphoria. This may be true for some. But there are many ways to think about and carry out a transition, and they don’t always have to include self-loathing.

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What is nonbinary?

We often sort things into binaries, systems with only two categories. The categories often take the form of “this” or “not this.” For example, fiction and nonfiction. Free and priced. These labels sometimes work when there are clear-cut differences between inanimate objects. However, people are rarely so simple.

The gender binary is the idea that all people are either entirely male or entirely female. No exceptions, nothing in between. We’ll point out how that idea is flawed and how gender identity is much more colorful than black and white.

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What is identity?

Identity is a complex concept describing how a person sees and presents themselves. This includes many different components, all of which exist on a continuum. We will touch on five of these components and some of the more common expressions of each. But ultimately, each of these can be entirely independent of each other and be combined in any combination. 

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